JUST. DIE. ALREADY.

You know, usually when you see paparazzi photos of celebrities showing affection for one another in public places such as supermarkets or on boats, they look like this:

Grainy, slightly out of focus, shot from a rented motorboat 800 feet away from the action in the photograph with a telephoto lens, NOT FUCKING POSED. Unlike every picture of Heidi Montag and Spencer, who took some time out this week from planning their upscale sports lounge in Murray Hill to visit the supermarket...



This makes me want to vomit. When I see this...



...I want to buy a gun. And when I see this...



...I want to choke a puppy to death. I can't help the way I feel people. Someone make it stop.